Drive..Drive..Drive the car..gently down the street

Finally, i have something more to write than the amount i drank and smoked and rendered myself silly!
Caught up with my driving lessons..! This times lesson was... 'Drive without any help'..! Had to gear myself up quite a bit for this one..! I am not the kind of person who likes 'speed' or 'cars' ( i mean if someone asks me which is my favorite car.... i stare and then blink..,thats how i am NOT fond of cars) so that evidently makes me a very passive learner when it comes to taking driving lessons. I learnt to drive a car because :

• currently, car is the only mode of conveyance available for me
• its safer driving a car in the nite in this city of wolfs
• u dont get wet if its raining.

Pretty basic, eh?

but then..Driving needs a lot of coordination ... and that just turns me off..! clutch, break, accelerator, and most of the time a combination and permutation of the three..! as if all this isnt enuff.. there are gears..4 or 5 of them ! and then there is a reverse-gear! what the 'flig'!!

My first journey alone in the car was not more than 4-5 kilometers but took the hell lot of courage! I cannot simply imagine how people can enjoy 'long drives'! Another thing to bog me down is letting go of all self-respect, especially if u of the 'woman' species.

Highlights of my first 'crusade':

• First of all.. i turn on the ignition.. press the accelerator..'screeeeeeeeech'.. 'hand break!'(f***!)
  
• Next, getting the car out of the apartment gate. Usually a gatekeeper/guard with a bored-cum-morose look opens one side of the gate to let out cars of all sizes.. but me being the unexperienced learner category, have to tell the gatekeeper to open both sides of gates..the first instance when u have to bear with the 'what-the-heck...fuck-off' look!
• I try changing gears at a turn and..the car stops with a jerk.. a big guy passing by in a bigger car stares... that 'who-the-fuck -gave-u-a-license' stare! and drives off with a swagger... am sure as much as men hate women driving on the roads.. they surely enjoy it more.. inflates their ego to the size of a watermelon!' assholes!!
• I stop at a red-light.. sweating.. more because i am worried sick whether i will really be able to push the car when the light turns green..?? ... the light turns green .... i fumble with the clutch/accelerator/break combination....I fail...and my car stops with a jerk..! (f***! f***! f***!) All the men species pass by with a smirk ('haah-lady-driver' look) on their faces..the women with a sympathetic i've-been-thru-this-sweetie' look! Meanwhile the light turns red again and so does my face!
• Finally, the worst part.. parking the car..! i somehow manage to complete the to-and-fro journey and its time to park the car back at its original place..i reverse and go forward and reverse and go forward..spend a good two-three minutes.. and just when i think its perfectly parked.. the gaurd/gatekeeper yells... 'abhi bhi line ke bahar hai'! Shamefaced.. I climb back into the car.. and take the gatekeepers help to guide me... seemingly irritated..he gives me vague directions.. and after 2 minutes.. gives up and says 'ab theek hai, rehne do' In other words.. 'chuck it u silly lady! balls to ur car! dont waste my time anymore!

I thank God for darkness and the fact that because of it ppl around cannot see my embarassed-flushed red face! I start walking back.. i realize i havent locked the car (f***! f***!f***!) So, i go back.. pretend to search something from the glove apartment and lock the car. I can see the guard smiling through the corner of my eye..! I somehow want to vanish into thin air!!